What Kind of Sleeper Are You?
Most of us have that special someone we are forced to sleep with every night. And there are definitely categories of sleepers. Which one are you?
- The Heater — One whose core body temperature causes them to sweat when touched at night.
- The Mummy — A strange phenomenon causing the sleeper to mummify themselves within their sheets.
- The Thief — A hidden neurosis that causes this person to feel alone and empty unless they have the comforter for themselves.
- The Spacehog — Harder to sleep with than a 200-lb. Newfoundland. Takes up more space in the bed than Andre the Giant.
- The Refrigerator — One who feels that someone else in the house is out to get them by way of frostbite. No matter how many layers of flannel or down, this sleeper is never quite warm enough.
- The Drooler — Enough said. Little white pillow stains are the trademark of this careless spittler.
- The Spooner — Keep an eye out for this nocturnal dweller. You never know when they’re going to sneak up behind you.
- And of course, the worst of all, the category that knows no gender. The Dutch Oven — All I can say is don’t eat high-carbohydrate meals before bedtime.