How to Tell if Your Marriage is Going Under
If you have ever thought of getting a divorce this story is for you. Divorces are usually ugly and very painful ordeals that should be avoided if at all possible. Here are some warning signs to watch for to tell if you are headed to disaster.Most of the time people do not get married thinking that a divorce is on the way. I say "most" because I have known a few that knew they shouldn't get married but did it anyway to avoid hurting their soon-to-be-ex's feelings. How crazy is that? Approximately half of all marriages end up with the Big D. Here are some early warning signs which can help predict if there's trouble ahead and provide time to work on solutions, from renowned relation expert Dr. Gilda Carle:
Money woes often lead to divorce: One study found that couples with no assets at the beginning of a three year period were a whopping 70% more likely to divorce by the end of that period than couples with at least $10,000 in assets.
If your parents divorced: Studies show that if your parents were divorced, you're at least 40% more likely to get divorced than if their relationship lasted. If your parents married others after splitting, you're 91% more likely to get divorced.
Smokers marrying nonsmokers: "People who take care of their health often don't respect partners who don't," says Dr. Carle, who contributes to a divorce advice website called divorce360.com.
You're more likely to divorce if you live in Utah, Arkansas, Kentucky or Oklahoma: These states have the youngest average age for marrying couples. Those states also have higher than average divorce rates. "The younger you are, the less you know what you really want, and the greater the chance that you and your mate will part," said Dr. Carle.
You are on your second marriage: "Second marriages break up more frequently than first ones," says Dr. Carle. "That's usually because of the complicated interactions with stepfamilies."
Big age difference: "If partners have a huge age discrepancy, sexual discord is likely, and the marriage is more likely to eventually head south," notes Dr. Carle.
If you have twins or triplets: Your marriage is 17% more likely to end in divorce than if your children are not multiple births.
If you're a woman two or more years older than your husband: Your marriage is 53% more likely to end in divorce than if he were one year or up to three years older.
If you're a male same-sex marriage: The union is 50% more likely to crumble in divorce than a heterosexual marriage. The odds of a female same-sex marriage lasting are far worse.